dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
is wine microwaveable?
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
