Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
