know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Randomize
