exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize
