she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Randomize
