Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Randomize
