SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
