soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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