I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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