There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
