Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
