Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
