belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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