That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
smell my finger.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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