i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Randomize