i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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