He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
