Dignity is for republicans.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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