oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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