hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Randomize