wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
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