Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
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