used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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