Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
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