This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize