Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
