Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
