so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
