maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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