ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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