I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
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