so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Randomize
