Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Randomize
