Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
