u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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