But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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