I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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