i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
pray to the hookup gods
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Randomize
