READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
