hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
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