the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Randomize
