So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Randomize
