In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
