He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize