hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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