do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Randomize
