Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
