I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Randomize
