I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
