Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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