So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
