I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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